TITLE: Gerasenes

It seems to me there are two types of people in this world.

There are those who run towards: the finish line, victory, better health, lower digits on the scale, happiness.

And then there are those like me. I run from. From my anxieties, from my insecurities, from my fears, from my past, from my future, from desire, from my own voice, from feeling useless and worthless.

I run to escape the nagging sensation of my own mortality, always present at the corner of my eye. “One side will have to go.”, says the poet Philip Larkin of the struggle of man with death.

I refuse to be the one to go.

I summon all the powers I have to make one step, and then another, and then one more, and one more, and one more. A never-ending dance between my body and gravity, which I will eventually lose. Not today.

In 1882 Friedrich Nietzsche pronounced the death of God. The problem with the death of God is that we are making a bad deal if we kill him, but keep the demons alive. He never really ruled over them, but at least there was a struggle, someone to fight on your side. You might still lose, and against the greatest demon, death, we all lose eventually, but we had an ally.

The demons didn’t die with God. They kept lurking and sneaking and crawling around. I know they are here. I can hear them whisper planning an ambush. I run.

It’s a war of attrition that I’m waging. I try to tire myself to tire them. I try to exhaust the source of energy they feed on. I run until I forget I want anything at all. If God doesn’t exist, what else am I supposed to do?

AUTHOR: Ivaylo Yorgov (Bulgaria)

Ivaylo is an amateur photographer working in black and white, looking to explore the subtle beauty in the shapes and textures that surround us. He is interested in that which we often overlook; in the scars we assemble while we live; in the trails we leave behind; in the seemingly small details that create our world. His images are nostalgic, melancholic, calm - images created to hint, rather than strike, to evoke memories rather than create impressions. Ivaylo's images are introspective and designed to connect the outer world with our inner selves, lying below the hustle of daily live. Like memories from a distant past, his photographs try to touch the gentle, soft, and delicate aspects of ourselves we often forget. By reminding us about the dark beauty of the world, Ivaylo aims to show a realistically human view of the world in which we are not dichotomically good or bad but possess both the best and the worst of the world.